Manifesting your dreams, and then changing your mind….

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So some of you know that I recently went off on tour with Sarah Brightman, and was due to be gone until December.

I was Co-ordinating the VIP experience on the road for her North and South American Dreamchaser tour. There were a lot of stops and starts in getting to the point of leaving. The tour was postponed, goal posts were moved… But, being paid to travel across the US has been a long standing dream of mine, and even though it took over a year of planning, and negotiating, and contracting etc, I always had every faith that it would happen.

And, it did.

What I did not prepare for however, was not enjoying this thing I had worked so hard to manifest!!

I don’t want to go into the reasons that I didn’t enjoy it, they are personal to me, but I did meet some amazing people, and I learned a huge amount about myself. I am now home, and although I have no idea what will happen next work wise,  I am always a busy bee, and I trust the Universe totally to provide for me….

I wanted to write this post not to talk about what happened, but to talk about it really being okay to change your mind.

I had all sorts of fears about changing my mind, about saying to my employer, “Hey, this isn’t fun for me, I need to go home.” The stuff that went through my head was endless, from “Am I making the right decision?” “Will I regret this?” To, “Does this compromise my integrity?” and “What will people think.” There were in fact SO MANY fears I had about making the decision, but in the end, I realised that I have chosen to live a life where I listen to my instincts, and that integrity for me, is all about being real and true.

And so, I am home.

Someone else is doing the job out there, and having a blast doing it, and I am still advancing the shows and doing some of the logistical stuff from here…..Whilst enjoying seeing my friends, and appreciating all that I have right here in the UK!!

Each of us grow and change, and what we want now may not be what we want tomorrow….For me, the lesson here, is really about enjoying the journey – massive cliche that it is, if you can do that, if you can have your happiness determined by the very adventure of being, rather than the outcome, then whatever happens, is A okay…

I really am happy to be home, no regrets, it’s all part of the very rich tapestry….  feeling blessed to have such wonderfully supportive friends and reminded how hugely adaptable we all are!

I would love to hear from you if you have a decision to make, or if you changed your mind about something big and learned from it!

On Purpose, With purpose,

Ebonie

 

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